Gita 17-18

As I read about renunciation, I thought about how in Christianity, we say that you ought to give (tithe), and do nice things for others without expecting a reward. This chapter went further to say that one should not do things expecting a reward, but also avoid worrying about the outcome. Many a time I have done the opposite: I avoid things I think will be painful or excessively hard. I have been learning to get over this in college, but I have grown to love doing things well so much so that I stick to the same old things I know I can do well out of fear of failure or rejection. I didn't play sports in high school or do intramurals here because I hated the idea of letting my team down by performing poorly. I'm in Latin IV this semester, and I feel extremely uncomfortable in that class. Many of my classmates are Classics majors or are for whatever reason quite well-versed in Latin, whereas I spend my time on the homework with my Latin dictionary glued to my hand. Thankfully, the class is more about analyzing literature and expounding on it than parsing and identifying grammatical things so I enjoy it a lot more than Latin I & II. Even more thankfully, people keep reminding me that doing my best is what is most important. I want to be like a sattvic worker, who is "free from egotism and selfish attachments, full of enthusiasm and fortitude in success and failure alike." 18.26-27