I've thoroughly enjoyed the challenge of the headstand, and wall poses...until today.
This morning, in my weightlifting class, my coach led us through the P90X abs circuit. It wasn't easy, but it wasn't impossible because I had done it once before. He reminded us to stretch for a few minutes before we left class. I dutifully stretched, but forgot something extremely important until now (eveningtime). When you do a lot of work on one portion of the body (like the core, abs), you have to work the backside of it (in this case - the back)! Unfortunately, we did minimal back exercises, and I neglected to remember to do some on my own. Now I'm afraid to do any because my back aches and feels really tight.
My friend who is a health science studies major suggested lying on a pillow with my arms up until I felt my back relax. It might be my impatience keeping me from doing that for as long as I need to, but I didn't feel a change in the tension of my back. All this is to say I have not practiced Headstand since class. Depending on how I feel tomorrow before class, I'll do the L pose. I really like that one, and I don't think it will feel as burdensome on my body as the headstand pose would...
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Sutra Response
2.33 When improper thoughts disturb the mind, there should be constant pondering over the opposites.
2.34 Improper thoughts and emotions such as those of violence- whether done, caused to be done, or even approved of- indeed, any thought originating in desire, anger or delusion, whether mild medium or intense- do all result in endless pain and misery. Overcome such distractions by pondering on the opposites.
It's easy to let improper thoughts fester and sit, but it is important to challenge them head on.
Let me explicate with a real life example (and a lot of vulnerability - get ready). I really love sweets. I know we are genetically dispositioned to enjoy desserts, fruit, and the like, but I tend to be gluttonous about my love for ice cream, cookies, cookie cake, etc. Thankfully, suppressing that flaw is a work in progress. A lot of people give me flak for thinking this way since I'm both petite and slender. For me, the problem is not a weight issue, but (potentially surprisingly) a dental one. My teeth look good now, but that's because they had spacers, fillings, sealants, braces, and a retainer. Aside from a genetically weak enamel covering my teeth, a large amount of my dental issues (namely the cavities) came as a result of my insatiable desire for sweets.
Thoughts about sweets (specifically dessert-type things such as doughnuts or cookies) plague me multiple times a day. Let's call these improper thoughts. There isn't anything wrong with wanting or having a brownie, but having a brownie and an ice cream sandwich everyday, for example, is not an appropriately balanced diet. I walk into Collins Cafe and have a cookie. Yay! Now I want at least one more. Instead of hopelessly dwelling on my desire for more than is necessary, the sutras wisely suggest thinking about the opposite. Thus, I can eat my cookie slowly, savoring it with milk or a little bit of soft serve instead of mindlessly pounding several cookies. Or I could plan ahead and eat a meal heavy in protein and whole grains, filling myself up with delicious wholesome foods that I enjoy, such as tomatoes (they're the best!). Then, when it comes to dessert time at the end of my meal, I won't want dessert, or won't want much because I'll have eaten my fill. A final alternative might be to consider the consequences of my actions before making a decision. Instead of hushing my conscience, I would do well to listen to it, "Tyler, if you want your body, especially your teeth to be at their best, you should bypass that platter of cake balls."
Even simply pondering these thoughts too intently could be dangerous. If I think about how I'm "depriving" myself, I'll feel even more upset. It's important that I remind myself of the good that doing the opposite of what my flesh wants is truly for the best...even when it's hard and peers try to pressure.
Friday, September 21, 2012
Response to Yoga from the Inside Out
I am currently working my way through Christina Sell's memoir Yoga from the Inside Out. I strongly identify with what she has said thus far. In the book, she is chronicling her journey from being at war with her body to loving herself wholly. Her methods of warfare, disrespecting her temple, ranged from bulimia to over-exercising. According to her summary of her adolescence, she struggled with an eating disorder that started with binging and purging and evolved into a struggle to perfect the art of proper diet and exercise. An important note she made in that regard was about the different industries in the world. She explained that the modeling industry and the fitness industry (among others) equally do us a disservice because they glorify certain body types instead of glorifying self-love and healthy living.
Sell received counseling and medical consultations on how to revive her body from the battle wounds left by her eating disorder. She learned how to eat for her health and exercise to regulate her diet. Her main mode of exercise was yoga, which not only helped her maintain her weight, but also her mental health. Soon, she became an aerobics an indoor cycling instructor when she was en route to participating in a bodybuilding competition. She was motivated to get her figure into a competitive shape. Unfortunately, it was then that her addictive tendencies resurfaced with exercise. Sell was over-training, and sometimes binging and purging.
In spite of her relapse, her physique was close to what the competitive fitness industry considers perfection. Nevertheless, Sell was unhappy. She described herself as "tired, constantly hungry, irritable, and unfocused." Her body was constantly aching, and her muscles were so tight, that she had trouble simply walking normally. She broke down emotionally when she went to a yoga workshop. As she folded into herself, her instructor confronted her, saying that while she excelled at persevering, it was time to let go.
While I have never struggled with an eating disorder, or competed in a bodybuilding competition, I find both of those subjects fascinating. As I mentioned in one of my first blog posts here, I did not get into fitness and health (e.g. being active several times a week and eating mostly whole, natural, unprocessed foods - save for sweets on the regular) until college. My personality might be described as Type A. I like getting things done as soon as possible, as well as possible, and I often let things that are out of my control stress me out. When I came to college, I realized exercising and regulating my diet help mollify my intense nature. During my freshman year, I ran a lot - frequently, not in quantity. I got shin splints, so I stopped running so much. In these past few years, I've picked up weightlifting and doing body weights exercises like push-ups for exercise. I love it, and I definitely get obsessive sometimes. I don't like taking rest days because I usually feel as though I can do more physically. I'm learning how significant rest is though...
A much less pleasant lesson I've learned in college is that I can easily work myself until I burn out. I've gotten sick pretty frequently these past few years, especially in the semesters that I've been serving as a Community Leader. I'm sure part of it is due to living in a small space with so many people, but I also know the other big part of it is that I try so hard (harder than necessary, probably) in every area of my life. I internalize my accomplishments, but I heavily weigh my mistakes against myself. I would say that's how I identify with Sell most, is having to learn to rest, physically, but also spiritually. I strive and strive and wish and hope, but things always work out better when I literally let things rest in God's hands*. I'm also learning that muscles rebuild faster when you give them time to heal than when you keep working out because they keep tearing. I try not to criticize myself so much when I make a mistake, and instead turn to God in gratitude for his infinite grace.
*I spent all of this week worrying because there's one last book I need to buy for a class. Since CLing doesn't pay the big bucks, and I'm paying for the GRE/grad school applications, I can't afford to spend more on textbooks. I told God that in prayer, and then kept reminding myself to make the circuits to find the lowest price for the book on Amazon, Chegg, etc. Today, I checked the library website for kicks to see if the book was in our library here.
IT WAS.
I have it now.
God is stretching my faith in Him practically, and I'm not complaining ;)
Sell received counseling and medical consultations on how to revive her body from the battle wounds left by her eating disorder. She learned how to eat for her health and exercise to regulate her diet. Her main mode of exercise was yoga, which not only helped her maintain her weight, but also her mental health. Soon, she became an aerobics an indoor cycling instructor when she was en route to participating in a bodybuilding competition. She was motivated to get her figure into a competitive shape. Unfortunately, it was then that her addictive tendencies resurfaced with exercise. Sell was over-training, and sometimes binging and purging.
In spite of her relapse, her physique was close to what the competitive fitness industry considers perfection. Nevertheless, Sell was unhappy. She described herself as "tired, constantly hungry, irritable, and unfocused." Her body was constantly aching, and her muscles were so tight, that she had trouble simply walking normally. She broke down emotionally when she went to a yoga workshop. As she folded into herself, her instructor confronted her, saying that while she excelled at persevering, it was time to let go.
While I have never struggled with an eating disorder, or competed in a bodybuilding competition, I find both of those subjects fascinating. As I mentioned in one of my first blog posts here, I did not get into fitness and health (e.g. being active several times a week and eating mostly whole, natural, unprocessed foods - save for sweets on the regular) until college. My personality might be described as Type A. I like getting things done as soon as possible, as well as possible, and I often let things that are out of my control stress me out. When I came to college, I realized exercising and regulating my diet help mollify my intense nature. During my freshman year, I ran a lot - frequently, not in quantity. I got shin splints, so I stopped running so much. In these past few years, I've picked up weightlifting and doing body weights exercises like push-ups for exercise. I love it, and I definitely get obsessive sometimes. I don't like taking rest days because I usually feel as though I can do more physically. I'm learning how significant rest is though...
A much less pleasant lesson I've learned in college is that I can easily work myself until I burn out. I've gotten sick pretty frequently these past few years, especially in the semesters that I've been serving as a Community Leader. I'm sure part of it is due to living in a small space with so many people, but I also know the other big part of it is that I try so hard (harder than necessary, probably) in every area of my life. I internalize my accomplishments, but I heavily weigh my mistakes against myself. I would say that's how I identify with Sell most, is having to learn to rest, physically, but also spiritually. I strive and strive and wish and hope, but things always work out better when I literally let things rest in God's hands*. I'm also learning that muscles rebuild faster when you give them time to heal than when you keep working out because they keep tearing. I try not to criticize myself so much when I make a mistake, and instead turn to God in gratitude for his infinite grace.
*I spent all of this week worrying because there's one last book I need to buy for a class. Since CLing doesn't pay the big bucks, and I'm paying for the GRE/grad school applications, I can't afford to spend more on textbooks. I told God that in prayer, and then kept reminding myself to make the circuits to find the lowest price for the book on Amazon, Chegg, etc. Today, I checked the library website for kicks to see if the book was in our library here.
IT WAS.
I have it now.
God is stretching my faith in Him practically, and I'm not complaining ;)
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Sutras Response
2.10 These patterns when subtle may be removed by developing their contraries.
Once upon a time, I went on a job interview. It was a pretty bad one as far as my ability to convince the interviewer I was right for the position, but it was great because I learned a lot from that experience. Something poignant the interviewer explained to me was how she dealt with her flaws and strengths. She acknowledged the fact that everyone has things they do well, and others not so well. As she continued, she said one of the most significant contributors to her success was what she called baselining. Upon finding out the things she did not do well, she worked hard to go from failing at them, to doing alright. Her point was that being average at many things outweighs being great at doing #1, and awful at 2-10. In that regard, developing the thought streams and spiritual disciplines counters the afflictions, as does minimizing one's egotistic thoughts (for example). On that note, we want to get the afflictions even lower than baseline status; to zero if possible.
Furthermore, we have active ways of minimizing our afflictions, through yoga (exercise) and meditation. Not only do these things act as distractions from those things which afflict us, but they help us to reconnect with our inner selves, who want what is best. When we withdraw from the world - in - we see things more clearly. Fleeing inward, especially toward God, literally redirects us from the negative things of this world such as greed, and ignorance to holier, life giving things, like Truth and love for others.
Once upon a time, I went on a job interview. It was a pretty bad one as far as my ability to convince the interviewer I was right for the position, but it was great because I learned a lot from that experience. Something poignant the interviewer explained to me was how she dealt with her flaws and strengths. She acknowledged the fact that everyone has things they do well, and others not so well. As she continued, she said one of the most significant contributors to her success was what she called baselining. Upon finding out the things she did not do well, she worked hard to go from failing at them, to doing alright. Her point was that being average at many things outweighs being great at doing #1, and awful at 2-10. In that regard, developing the thought streams and spiritual disciplines counters the afflictions, as does minimizing one's egotistic thoughts (for example). On that note, we want to get the afflictions even lower than baseline status; to zero if possible.
Furthermore, we have active ways of minimizing our afflictions, through yoga (exercise) and meditation. Not only do these things act as distractions from those things which afflict us, but they help us to reconnect with our inner selves, who want what is best. When we withdraw from the world - in - we see things more clearly. Fleeing inward, especially toward God, literally redirects us from the negative things of this world such as greed, and ignorance to holier, life giving things, like Truth and love for others.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Sugar Sugar (Honey Honey)
I've figured it out! Yoga is like a dance to some...perhaps something check off a list for others.
I just realized what yoga is for me...it's like sugar. Bear with me...
A lot of people use sugar (or salt in some cases) to intensify the flavor of something. It brings pep to something that was formerly "blah" or so-so. Well, I just got home from class and work; I had a nice little nap, but I was feeling tight all over. My first thought was to stretch, but I also wanted to hear something fun. So, I put on some Justin Timberlake, and then some Feist (my music is all over the place, yes) and got into my yoga groove (pun intended). I stretched, bopped, and sung to the music, elated. I love listening to music, and I like being active, so marrying the two seemed like a good idea.
In the middle of this mini yoga session, a fellow CL knocked on my door to tell me that she is going to start staff-wide yoga sessions set to her Insanity Yoga DVD. (Insanity Yoga?! Look at that...another challenge :) Once again, I love my staff (spending quality time with people in general really), so this is another beautiful marriage: staff time and stretchin'. I'm excited! I'll be sure to follow up with how it goes.
I am obviously a big fan of yoga, but I hope that if I wasn't so into it, I would find ways (like the aforementioned) to make it a more enjoyable experience. I hope this has inspired people from class (or the blogosphere, I guess) to shake up how you do what you do. Make it sweet :)
I just realized what yoga is for me...it's like sugar. Bear with me...
A lot of people use sugar (or salt in some cases) to intensify the flavor of something. It brings pep to something that was formerly "blah" or so-so. Well, I just got home from class and work; I had a nice little nap, but I was feeling tight all over. My first thought was to stretch, but I also wanted to hear something fun. So, I put on some Justin Timberlake, and then some Feist (my music is all over the place, yes) and got into my yoga groove (pun intended). I stretched, bopped, and sung to the music, elated. I love listening to music, and I like being active, so marrying the two seemed like a good idea.
In the middle of this mini yoga session, a fellow CL knocked on my door to tell me that she is going to start staff-wide yoga sessions set to her Insanity Yoga DVD. (Insanity Yoga?! Look at that...another challenge :) Once again, I love my staff (spending quality time with people in general really), so this is another beautiful marriage: staff time and stretchin'. I'm excited! I'll be sure to follow up with how it goes.
I am obviously a big fan of yoga, but I hope that if I wasn't so into it, I would find ways (like the aforementioned) to make it a more enjoyable experience. I hope this has inspired people from class (or the blogosphere, I guess) to shake up how you do what you do. Make it sweet :)
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Challenge Accepted
I have thoroughly enjoyed our yoga class these past few weeks. I'm really excited about what is to come. Last semester, I took Baylor's yoga HP ("fitness and relaxation?" I call it "yoga" anyway...). As a result of that class, and taking a yoga class my freshman year here, I consider myself somewhat advanced. The poses we've done have been at most moderately challenging to me, simply because I've been introduced to most of them before. Nevertheless, I have learned that I need to make modifications to some poses, as I have been doing them incorrectly, or am too short to do some in certain ways (such as supta virasana on the bolster or the shoulder stand on two blankets instead of three).
What has made the class so great, in my opinion, is the zeal for which we are approaching yoga as a class. From my perspective, no one has been shamed for falling or losing their balance. This might be partly due to the fact that we have a desire to get the poses down well. Everyone gives it the old college try. In my yoga class last semester, there was a guy who obviously didn't want to be there. He would come to class late every day, audibly plop himself onto the mat with a sign, and exert minimal effort into his practice. It was frustrating to see. It was also inconsiderate of him to put forth so little, when our instructor and the rest of the class made a conscious effort to get to class on time and make a solid attempt at the poses.
On that note, Dr. Schultz mentioned that we are on our way to doing headstands.
What?
I've never done a handstand in my life, not to mention a headstand. My yoga instructor asked for volunteers during one of our last sessions of the semester to learn how to do headstands in front of the class. A few brave souls stepped up. The rest of us had looked on sheepishly as they raised their hands, then boldly leaned forward to see how they fared. They all did well. I was proud and impressed. Now, it seems I have no choice but to step forward and learn myself. I'm partly terrified, partly excited. I liken it to my experience ziplining a month ago. I'm afraid of heights, or as someone who was in line with me said, I'm afraid of falling from high up. I didn't really want to go, but I knew it'd be somewhat fun, and a good experience. Once I got on the platform, I almost unhooked myself and walked away. I actually took a deep breath, and jumped. It was awful at first, and then it was amazing. I felt like I was flying!
I doubt doing a headstand will feel like flying, but it'll feel cool to say I did it. I'm up for the challenge :)
What has made the class so great, in my opinion, is the zeal for which we are approaching yoga as a class. From my perspective, no one has been shamed for falling or losing their balance. This might be partly due to the fact that we have a desire to get the poses down well. Everyone gives it the old college try. In my yoga class last semester, there was a guy who obviously didn't want to be there. He would come to class late every day, audibly plop himself onto the mat with a sign, and exert minimal effort into his practice. It was frustrating to see. It was also inconsiderate of him to put forth so little, when our instructor and the rest of the class made a conscious effort to get to class on time and make a solid attempt at the poses.
On that note, Dr. Schultz mentioned that we are on our way to doing headstands.
What?
I've never done a handstand in my life, not to mention a headstand. My yoga instructor asked for volunteers during one of our last sessions of the semester to learn how to do headstands in front of the class. A few brave souls stepped up. The rest of us had looked on sheepishly as they raised their hands, then boldly leaned forward to see how they fared. They all did well. I was proud and impressed. Now, it seems I have no choice but to step forward and learn myself. I'm partly terrified, partly excited. I liken it to my experience ziplining a month ago. I'm afraid of heights, or as someone who was in line with me said, I'm afraid of falling from high up. I didn't really want to go, but I knew it'd be somewhat fun, and a good experience. Once I got on the platform, I almost unhooked myself and walked away. I actually took a deep breath, and jumped. It was awful at first, and then it was amazing. I felt like I was flying!
I doubt doing a headstand will feel like flying, but it'll feel cool to say I did it. I'm up for the challenge :)
Thursday, September 13, 2012
"Fixity" of the mind on the Lord
Somehow, I didn't think spiritual disciplines would come up in this class...It is, after all, a yoga and philosophy class. Nevertheless, they have, and now that I have read about them, it makes sense. Yoga itself is a spiritual discipline. It takes grit to sit still and breathe deeply, or balance in tree pose and breathe deeply without swaying branches or uprooting. According to the Kleshas, one may evade the grasp of the five afflictions by regularly practicing spiritual disciplines. Some suggested disciplines include studying sacred texts and dedicating action to God. Oh my. It's just like Christianity. When my mind is racing and I'm feeling overwhelmed, I study the Bible. When I don't know what else to do about a problem, or literally don't know what to do with myself, I get on my knees and pray. When I'm scrambling to finish a seemingly impossible assignment, I put on some worship music to pull myself out of the spiral of "I can't do this!!!" thoughts. When I get haughty (egoistic), I find myself in trouble; I end up struggling to forge my own path. I had everything under control before... God orders my steps when I let Him lead, when I follow after Him.
I still live in ignorance, have egotistic moments, and so on, but God forgives me. I tell Him I'm sorry for trying to take His job and plead with Him to take it back because I'm awful at it. When I focus on Him and His goodness instead of what's wrong in my life, or my shortcomings, I'm at peace.
I still live in ignorance, have egotistic moments, and so on, but God forgives me. I tell Him I'm sorry for trying to take His job and plead with Him to take it back because I'm awful at it. When I focus on Him and His goodness instead of what's wrong in my life, or my shortcomings, I'm at peace.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
The Practice
I think I mentioned in my first post that I am taking a weight training class this semester, and that I am an on again off again runner. Well, I'm starting to see how all of those things are coming together...
Preface: I am very happy with my legs. If I do say so myself, they look really good. They are nice and muscular, although, according to a physical therapist I visited, they are unevenly muscular. Unfortunately, that has made my knees (literally) weak, making running, squats, lunges, taking the stairs, anything that puts pressure on my knees feel painful according to how much I've been doing the aforementioned. I haven't been very diligent about keeping up with my recommended exercises for building up my leg muscles as a whole. (I'm a really disciplined person, but the leg exercises seem to fall to the wayside).
Now that the back story is done, I have been doing a lot of upper body work in WT class. Consequently I have these lovely protective calluses building up. I really hope they don't get in the way of my slowly improving downward dog...Meanwhile, yoga has been great at opening up my chest, and relieving my back of all the tightening that happens in WT. I've been meaning to get back into running, but I obviously have some reasons to proceed with caution. When I do, I will be well prepared with an arsenal of post-running stretches such as Supta Virasana and Western Stretch. Finally, I think the leg work we do in yoga (ahem, holding the downward dog) will be great for my legs, since my upper body gets all the love in WT class.
Preface: I am very happy with my legs. If I do say so myself, they look really good. They are nice and muscular, although, according to a physical therapist I visited, they are unevenly muscular. Unfortunately, that has made my knees (literally) weak, making running, squats, lunges, taking the stairs, anything that puts pressure on my knees feel painful according to how much I've been doing the aforementioned. I haven't been very diligent about keeping up with my recommended exercises for building up my leg muscles as a whole. (I'm a really disciplined person, but the leg exercises seem to fall to the wayside).
Now that the back story is done, I have been doing a lot of upper body work in WT class. Consequently I have these lovely protective calluses building up. I really hope they don't get in the way of my slowly improving downward dog...Meanwhile, yoga has been great at opening up my chest, and relieving my back of all the tightening that happens in WT. I've been meaning to get back into running, but I obviously have some reasons to proceed with caution. When I do, I will be well prepared with an arsenal of post-running stretches such as Supta Virasana and Western Stretch. Finally, I think the leg work we do in yoga (ahem, holding the downward dog) will be great for my legs, since my upper body gets all the love in WT class.
Sunday, September 2, 2012
Spiritual Slap
The most recent bit of How Yoga Works really convicted me. Friday showed the Captain that he has been blaming others for acting a certain way, upsetting him, when he had the power to change his own perspective all along. She accused him of stubbing his own toe and getting upset with others for causing his pain. This particular analogy left me feeling enlightened. Of course! I judge people and get upset when I can't change whatever it is I don't like about them. I am fully capable of changing the situation around.
I quickly let myself step into the role of "the victim." I don't even have to go that far. When I believe that a person is irritating in and of herself, I am only contributing to her irritating behavior because I'll likely treat her as if she's being irritating. Then, in an irritated state, she will be rude to me and the cycle will continue. (Self-fulling prophecy, ftw)! Continuing in the dramatics, I say, "wah wah, she doesn't like me." Well, it would certainly help if I try treating her better than she treats me. Not to one up her, but to win her over. I must also remember that everyone has bad days. It's possible that I'm catching this girl on an especially rough day. I used to work in retail. For some reason, customers often like to take their stress and grief out on we salespeople, either in making us their therapist for half an hour, or by treating us as badly as they feel. I had to remind myself that the latter group have families and people who have to go home to them. Then I would feel bad for those families, and try to treat the customer kindly. Or, I would remind myself that the family might see this person as sweet and endearing, and they deserve to be treated as such. We can all use some respect.
*sigh of exasperation* These lessons are easy to write about, but not so easy to practice. Best wishes, y'all.
I quickly let myself step into the role of "the victim." I don't even have to go that far. When I believe that a person is irritating in and of herself, I am only contributing to her irritating behavior because I'll likely treat her as if she's being irritating. Then, in an irritated state, she will be rude to me and the cycle will continue. (Self-fulling prophecy, ftw)! Continuing in the dramatics, I say, "wah wah, she doesn't like me." Well, it would certainly help if I try treating her better than she treats me. Not to one up her, but to win her over. I must also remember that everyone has bad days. It's possible that I'm catching this girl on an especially rough day. I used to work in retail. For some reason, customers often like to take their stress and grief out on we salespeople, either in making us their therapist for half an hour, or by treating us as badly as they feel. I had to remind myself that the latter group have families and people who have to go home to them. Then I would feel bad for those families, and try to treat the customer kindly. Or, I would remind myself that the family might see this person as sweet and endearing, and they deserve to be treated as such. We can all use some respect.
*sigh of exasperation* These lessons are easy to write about, but not so easy to practice. Best wishes, y'all.
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